


Voice

by LucifersUnicorn



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Death, F/M, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-22
Updated: 2017-08-22
Packaged: 2018-12-18 13:43:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11875737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LucifersUnicorn/pseuds/LucifersUnicorn
Summary: The voice in your head won't leave you alone until you've done what has to be done and you know that. You start doing everything to end it but will it stop ?





	Voice

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know how or why I did this. I'm sorry ?

You waited in the darkness for a while now. Waited until the bunker was quiet.

It was dim and you knew it was time. Your eyes accustomed to the faint light so you could see just enough. You checked the revolver in your hand, six bullets made out of an old angel blade were enough because you knew you didn't need more, you were a good shooter.

 

You approached Sams room first. Slowly opening the door you saw him lying there asleep.  
  


You loved your brothers and Castiel, and of course you loved your boyfriend Crowley, but you needed to end this. Why exactly you needed to end it you didn't know, it was just in your head and it won't let go until you did it, you knew that. In a sick way you wanted this, having a slight feeling of peace about your plan you couldn't understand. But the urge to finish it was bigger than the doubts.

 

You stood on the end of Sams bed, tears in your eyes. “I'm so sorry Sammy.” you whispered as quiet as you could, wiping your eyes. You aimed at his head and pulled the trigger.  
  
A loud bang went through the bunker and you knew it would take no time til Dean will storm into the room, so you quickly hid behind the door, waiting for Dean to come in.

 

You heard his footsteps down the hall and waited for him.

The lights turned on and you held your breath.

 

“Sammy.” you heard Dean cry out, but now it was definitely to late for turning back.

 

“Dean, turn around.” you said your voice so low and almost surprisingly steady.

 

When Dean saw that it was you, he let his angel blade fall, you heard it with a metallic chink hit the floor. Shock? Or maybe false trust in you ?  
  
“Damn, Y/N what happened ?” you could hear at his voice how hard it was for him to speak after seeing and realizing that Sam was dead.

 

Dean reached out for you but you held your weapon up. “Don't come any closer Dean!” you warned him.

 

“Did you shoot Sam ? Why Y/N?” Dean asked, his voice shaking.

 

You felt the lump in your throat and the tears building up again. But you had to stay strong and do this, finish this, just a little bit longer being strong. The need and urge to kill them all was so strong, the voice in your head was strong.

 

“I'm so sorry Dean.” you pulled the trigger again and closed your eyes.

 

When you heard the thump of Deans body on the ground you slowly opened your eyes again, just in this moment you heard a flutter of wings. Castiel.

 

“Y/N, Dean prayed to me and...” he stopped before finishing at the sight of Deans and Sams dead bodies.

 

He run over to your brothers bodies, probably checking with his angel mojo if he can do something but you knew even Cas couldn't do anything now for them. And in your head that seemed just the right thing now.

 

“I'm sorry Cas.” you said, you felt the need to apologize to all of them, even if you weren't exactly sure if you were sorry. Again you hold your weapon up, aiming directly at Cas who looked up at you from the ground on his knees beside Dean. He didn't looked threatened, probably he thought that you had a normal gun, a gun that couldn't kill him. You felt almost bad for him not knowing what was going to happen.

 

Before he could say or do anything, you shot.   
Cas face went to pure shock when he realized what's happening before you had to close your eyes because of the bright white light.

 

You took a deep breath, giving them a last look when you went down the hall, on your way to the kitchen.

 

Now you would wait, wait with a glass of whiskey, but just one, you couldn't get drunk yet.

You waited for Crowley, he was the last one, the one you probably loved the most. You still heard this voice in your head hammering _Kill them, you need to kill them all_. Over and over again.

 

Probably five minutes later you sat at the kitchen table, the weapon was still in your hand, in your other one a finally your whiskey.

 

“Hello darling, everything alright ?” you heard Crowley from behind you, you were used to it, him popping up randomly, so you didn't get scared anymore.

 

You had your revolver so he couldn't see it, still in your hand but under the table.

 

“Sure, everything's fine Crowley.” you said, turning your head so you could look at him but you never were a good liar and Crowley could see through you.

 

“What's wrong?” he asked, laying his arms around your shoulder from behind, leaning down and giving you a kiss. You kissed back of course, almost didn't want it to end.   
You knew it was the last time feeling Crowley hugging you, kissing you.

 

You gave him a sad smile. “I did something and I don't know if it was a mistake. I mean, this would probably hunt down and drive me insane for the rest of my life if I don't end it and it's anyway too late to turn back now.”

 

Crowley squeezed you a bit just before he let you out of the hug. Suddenly looking wary at you.

“Y/N, what did you do ?” he asked, staring at you after looking around. It almost seemed like he realized how quiet the bunker was, how you were out of your room and your brothers weren't around you.

 

“Crowley, I killed Sam, Dean and Cas.” you confessed him, it didn't matter anymore. “I had to, my head, the voice. It won't stop until I finish it.”  
  
Crowleys face was beyond shock about what you just told him. Your brothers, Cas and him weren't the best friends, you knew that, but this ? Of course he wouldn't expect something like this, especially not from you.

“What do you mean until you finish _it_?” he carefully asked. “You mean _it_ isn't finished ?”

 

“No, it will end with you!” you said, getting back the strong urge to finally finish it, quickly standing up from your chair and holding the weapon at Crowley.

  
“I made the bullets out of an old unused angel blade. That's why they could kill Cas and that's why they can kill you too.” you told Crowley, almost in a psychopathic voice. Just in case he would try to flee.

“I love you Crowley and I'm so sorry my dear.” you took a deep breath, pulling the trigger again, closing your eyes again and waiting for the thump of Crowleys body.

 

After hearing the fall of him, it was quiet.

The voices stopped, you could only hear your own heartbeat.

 

Sitting down you filled your glass again and directly swallowing all, just to refill your glass immediately again.

Now you started slowly feeling really weird, feeling almost like it wasn't you talking and killing, but it was you, you with the voices. Maybe it was just the alcohol that started to kick in and confusing you ? Normally you could tolerate a bit more.

 

It was quiet but suddenly you started hearing the voice again.

  
_End it! Kill. Them. ALL!_

  
You screamed grabbing your own head, your hair. “Stop! I killed them, I killed them all. Why does this not stop?” now your tears falling free. Your gaze went over to Crowleys body and you heard a laugh, a long crazy laugh, almost like a scream of amusement. It must have been your own but you were so bewildered about your own doings, you weren't sure what was real anymore.

 

_You need to end it! Just finally end it. End it with yourself!_

 

You suddenly felt the gun at your chin, holding it with your own hand but you didn't brought it there. You tried to take it down but you had no control anymore.  
  


And then you heard a laughing, louder and louder until you heard your own voice laughing.

But _you_ didn't laugh.

And it was this moment you realized you must be possessed. This moment you cursed yourself for not finally getting the tattoo, always delaying it, afraid of getting one.

 

“Wow, that was fun. Almost too easy. Remember me bitch ? The demon your brothers thought they killed ? Whose demon friends they killed, looking amused at me for having friends as a demon but in the meantime their little sister is fucking the king of hell, he making you believe he could love? Making them believe he could love ?Could love you? An abominable human?” you heard your own voice say, as it started to laugh.

 

“You underestimated me. I'm not that easy killed, no angel blade or bullets or demon knife can kill me, but I thought, why not pretend it ? So I could get my chance for revenge with surprise. And now see there, I got into your head, I twisted your thoughts and I used you for killing everyone you love, I even made you doubting if you really love them meanwhile. And I let you love Crowley, so it would hurt you stupid human with your stupid feeling more now that you know he didn't love you.” she laughed again with your voice.

 

You tried to scream tried to fight her, you screamed trapped inside own body. “Liar, you're a fucking liar!” you yelled at her but just inside your head, she didn't let your voice out. Your thoughts run wild. Why didn't Cas or Crowley could see you were possessed, why didn't they notice, why did no one notice?

 

“Too pathetic. I can't be killed easy and you wonder how they couldn't see me ? Let's say, I'm very good at hiding” you heard her laugh again.

 

“What I really wondered “ she starting looking down at Crowleys body “what you liked at him. Not just but even his vessel is way older than you. He must have fucked good or was it his wealth ? Maybe I should ask some of his bitches he had in hell when he wasn't with you?” you felt the grin on your face, knowing exactly she had your weak spot, using it like pouring salt in a wound.

  
“It isn't interesting anymore anyway, would change nothing since he's dead. Because...you know, _you_ killed him.” she laughed again. “Even if I have to give myself a bit credit too, since I helped.

 

“Oh well, seems like it's getting boring with you, you don't try to fight anymore. Too sad but don't worry, had my fun long enough, I'll be so nice and end you and your misery called life.” you felt the gun pressing harder against your chin.  
  
“Wait, did I say end your misery ? Oh, my bad, I just meant your life. You know, since I possess your body I can hold your soul, and since you killed the king, thanks for that, was very dramatic by the way, every demon has free access to every corner of hell. No more rules, which means I will personally make sure you're going down there and that you will get the worse spot I can find beside Lucifers cage that I unfortunately can't open and throw you in. And you will always remember I took everything from you just as your idiotic family took everything from me and I'll make sure it gets worse for you” a wicked grin on your face when you heard the gun shortly for the last time.

  
And everything went black.

 


End file.
